“But that’s still not where chivalry got killed. Chivalry got killed by the feminist movement on all them magazines that got women going crazy, because women got too much advice about men from other women. And they don’t know what the fuck hey’re talking about.
And it’s true. I see the shit in the magazines. I don’t read ’em, but I be seeing the cover. I look at– you ever be in the grocery store, fellas, you look at one of them magazines like, “What is this?” And it say on the cover:
“A hundred ways to please your man” by… some lady.
Get outta here, man. come on.
Ain’t no hundred ways. That list is four things long.
Just suck his dick, play with his balls, then fix him a sandwich and don’t talk so much, and they’re gon’ be happy.
And then the magazines trick the women. The magazines start picking at your self-esteem. Every page you turn, you start feeling fatter, and uglier, and you feel like your clothes aren’t good enough.
And the magazines have you forgetting how fucking beautiful you are.
And that’s what happens. Now look what happens.
And then you forget how beautiful you are, and we all suffer.
If pussy was a stock, it would be plummeting right now because you’ve flooded the market with it. You’re giving it away too easy.
I’m just… being truthful.
I’m just talking.
It would plummet!
We’d be watching the news.
“Today, pussy plummeted again on the NASDAQ.
Gold is up ten points.”
You can see it. You ever have this happen? This is how confusing it is. This is the practical application of what I’m talking about.
Like a guy will be out– this happens a lot, guys– you’ll be at a club, a bar, right? You’re just kicking it with your boys, and a girl walks by, and, man, she looks good. She looks good. Not good in that classical way.
I mean, you know, I’m talking good like, she got half her ass hanging out her skirt. Mm.
Her titties are all mashed together…
Popping out the top of her turtleneck and shit.
And you’re with your buddies, right? You’re with your buddies, you got a couple of drinks in you, and you see a girl, you might try to talk to her. It just might not come out right.
I don’t know what you’d say to her:
“DAMN, look at them titties!”
The girl gets mad at you.
“Oh, uh-uhh. Oh, wait a minute. Wait a minute!
Just because I’m dressed this way, does NOT…
Make me a whore.”
Which is true. Gentlemen, that is true. Just because they dress a certain way doesn’t mean they *are* a certain way. Don’t ever forget it.
But, ladies, you must understand that that is fucking confusing.
It just is.
Now that would be like me, Dave Chappelle the comedian, walking around the streets in a cop uniform.
Somebody might run up on me.
“Oh, thank God. Officer, help us. come on. They’re over here. Help us!”
I’m not gonna be like:
“Oh! Just because I’m dressed this way does not make me a police officer.”
You understand what I’m saying?
It’s like, “All right, lady, fine, fine. You are not a whore.
But you *are* wearing a whore’s uniform, I’ll tell you that shit right now.”
Little misunderstandings can happen. And then, man, we misunderstand women a lot. You know, we always undermine their feelings. You can’t do that to them.”- DAVE CHAPELLE’S “Killin’ Them Softly”